COVID, COVID-19, HELP, DEPRESSION, STRESS, ISOLATION, ANXIETY AND COVID-19: HELPING AND LOVING OTHERS DURING THE CORONAVIRUS PANDEMIC

Depression, Stress, Isolation, Anxiety and Covid-19: Helping and Loving Others During the Coronavirus Pandemic

What does love look like? We all need to receive love. We are meant to give love. Humans are wired for love, connection and community.

When trials and tribulations shake up our world, some individuals tend to become more loving, and others…less loving. They either respond with empathy and care or selfishness and irritation with others. Sometimes, selfishness is rooted in a lack of love for others. Other times, irritation with others is rooted in trauma, depression, anxiety or other medical problems (for example, thyroid problems adversely affect the brain).

One day, a few weeks ago, I was at the grocery store when I encountered an angry stranger. I was on my way with my shopping cart to another aisle when a man confronted me with an angry face. He was mad that my cart contained an item which he wanted. This has never happened to me, but I understand these are peculiar times.

I smiled at him and told him he could have the item before he reached in my cart, grabbed it and scurried to the check out. Yes, he was inconsiderate. I started to think about it, and realized that we can never know what stress, anxiety and/or depression someone is encountering in his or her private life. Might as well love.

Love never fails!

Just as it is easy to think only of oneself during stressful times, it’s also easy during times of crisis to compare. That is, to compare ourselves to others before judging them with our limited information. We might think, “Oh, they don’t have it so bad” or “Oh, their experience looks good…must be nice!” The judgments flow naturally because we are human and it’s easy to compare.

What does love look like? We can all benefit ourselves and others with these basic reminders about love.

Love is patient and kind. Love considers what others might need or want. That is, love considers what would brighten up someone else’s day. Love “suffers long” and copes with others, showing kindness even where it is undeserved.

Love does not envy, boast or brag. Love neither becomes jealous of what another has earned or been gifted, nor does love boast or brag (to make others become jealous, envious or inferior).

Love is neither arrogant nor proud. Love does not think too highly of oneself. Love does not judge rashly because rash and petty judgment comes from pride. It is prideful to think that we – in our limited knowledge – know what others are going through. Nobody can understand another human like God can, and nobody has all the information to judge appropriately. When it comes to knowing people fully, we see the mere tip of the iceberg.

Love is not rude or resentful. Love does not resent others if they are doing well or on a different path. Love thinks before it speaks. Love includes others, not showing discrimination. Love does not make one feel drained, hurt, inferior, used or unaccepted. Love does not steal what belongs to someone else. Rather, love considers others…making them feel accepted, cared for, refreshed, appreciated, affirmed, safe, motivated and encouraged (love also tells the truth with care and kindness, even if the truth is unpleasant).

Wishing you a day of joy, peace and most of all…love. You are loved. How can you take action in the next few days to actively show love in a practical way? Now is a good time to show, give and receive love.

Xx Becky

“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” 1 Corinthians 13:7,8

This is my new coaching website!  I would appreciate you if you would simply like and share my post so that others can be helped and comforted during these hard times.  Thank you. 

3 Simple Ways To Cope With Information Overload and Overwhelm During the Coronavirus Pandemic

Have you felt overwhelmed lately?  A few days ago, someone I know and love was becoming depressed with information overload.  The bad news keeps rolling in on news channels, and some channels are worse than others.  Some of the news is fact-based and important to know…some not. 

Then, today, I spoke with someone who told me she felt invigorating and energized after turning off the non-stop news stream for one week. 

What we consume truly affects our states of mind and our energy levels.  What we consume affects how valuable we can be to others. It’s not that easy to focus these days, but it can be done.  

First, embrace what I call a “controlled ignorance.”  This is not the same as carelessness or an irresponsible apathy.  In fact, if you know me personally, you know that I am likely the least apathetic person you know!  I love researching and getting all the facts.  Instead, what this means is consuming enough facts and information, but only enough to be a great citizen and helpful to others.  In other words, this means being well-informed with the facts, but not to the point we are drowning in fear, tossing and turning by mixed news messages.  Again, this is neither “ignorance is bliss” nor is it a harmful apathy.  

There is a difference between being beneficially informed about a subject and being weighed down all day about it.  Having an excess of needless information won’t lend to the solution, and it will only cause more anxiety and ultimately, family harm.  For example, gathering the stats on the daily death rates for every state across the country and announcing it to the family is not helpful if this means ignoring our families all day long.  Our children need us during this time!  Loads of needless information take away value and energy that we could be adding to our own lives and to others.  Talking endlessly in circles – hours after hours – with our buddies about information neither lends to the solution nor does it make our children and other family members feel loved or safe during this time.  Yes, we do need information, but this could end up looking something like the law of diminishing returns when it comes to information consumption.  Lately, I refuse to have my thoughts and focus dictated by others – people in power – with political and personal agendas.

Second, add value to your life, your family members’ or your friends’ lives.  In whatever way you can.  When our minds are filled with thoughts of how we can help ourselves or others, there is not much room for useless information.  What fills the space in your mind?  The space in our minds is valuable real estate, yet how often do we give this “precious land” away to thoughts and to people that do not matter?  What information and message are we putting into the lives of those around us (our children, spouse, friends, etc.)?  Do people feel fearful or hopeful after they speak with you?  Do they feel life when around us? 

Adding value can come in many forms.  Simple ways to add value to your own life and others’ lives are to go for a walk or run, make a healthy dinner, send a thoughtful message to someone or buy something calming for someone.  I recently sent several of my friends some calming, chemical-free, lead-free candles (from my favorite candle store, http://www.enlightencandlesarizona.com).  How can you show someone love in a practical way?  People need love right now.  Check out my previous article on loving during these hard times.  You have the power to add value and blessing into someone else’s life.  Perhaps this comes through words, actions or giving.

Finally, maintain a future focus.  Focus, especially a future focus, helps ease information overload in the present.  Allow yourself to dream, too.  Dream of that future vacation you always wanted and the task you wanted to accomplish.  Writing down future goals and what you want to focus on also helps.  It helps to solidify our focus.  As for the immediate future, what do you want to do tonight?  It can be motivating for ourselves, our children and others in our families to have something fun or different to look forward to each day.  It can also be motivating to set a goal.  It is rewarding when we accomplish a task like finishing an organizational project or completing a creative endeavor.  Regarding focus, if you are not choosing what to focus on, others will gladly waste it for you.  Take your focus back!

Limiting what information you allow in your life, adding value to your own and others’ lives and maintaining a future focus are great ways to cope with information overload.  Onward! 

Xx Becky

This is my new coaching website!  I would appreciate you if you would simply like and share my post so that others can be helped and comforted during these hard times.  Thank you.